Don’t let outrage ruin your career!
If you work for yourself, I’ll wager at least one of the following has happened to you:
Someone was late for a meeting, and they still expected you to pay for the coffee.
A job you really wanted – and were certain you would get – went to a competitor who isn’t half as amazing as you.
You got a job you really wanted, but it morphed into the job from hell as soon as you started working on it.
You delivered an amazing piece of work, but the client decided to add a few ‘tweaks’ that mean you can’t show it to anyone, because now it’s rubbish.
Someone criticised your work.
At least one client didn’t pay you on time.
I could go on.
While these are all common freelance frustrations (they’ve all happened to me), there’s one thing that really separates the vodka from the tap water.
That thing is this: how do you react to your frustrations?
When I first started out as a freelance writer, I did a lot of networking. At one particular breakfast meeting, I found myself sitting next to a man who ran a small IT consultancy.
We started chatting, and he told me about someone he’d recently been speaking to – someone who had declined his kind offer to become a client.
“I couldn’t believe it,” this man spluttered, in between enthusiastic bites of suspiciously curled bacon and beige scrambled egg.
“I wasted so much time talking to that bloke…and after all that he decided not to work with me. Doesn’t he know I’ve got an office to pay for?”
I took a sip of weak, tepid coffee.
“Your office payments aren’t his responsibility,” I said. “You have to be good enough at what you do for people to want to work with you – so if you’re not, your business clearly isn’t working.”
“Why don’t you do yourself a favour and go back to full-time employment?” I continued. “Then you could spend your free time relaxing, instead of fretting over the uncontrollable actions of hapless others.”
No, of course I didn’t say any of that.
I just nodded blandly along, mumbling the occasional “yes I know…that’s terrible…” whenever he looked at me for a response.
(The coffee part is actually true; for some unknown reason coffee is always weak and tepid at networking meetings).
I try to recall that conversation whenever I’m tempted to give in to any of my own freelance frustrations. I’ve also learned over time that most work-related frustrations – whether as a freelancer or in full-time employment – are a result of other people’s actions.
Translation: they’re things you can’t control.
But you can control whether you want to waste time and energy getting all huffy over them, or try to learn from them instead.
Easier said than done, I know. But I do try.
Like the time I responded with a polite “thank you for buying my book” to the person who gave me a one-star Amazon review, instead of sharing what I really thought, which was “how dare you criticise me, you humourless cretin?”
See. I really am trying.
Related Articles
When Schedules, Goals, and Rituals Don’t Work
Why failing to plan could be just what you need to succeed.
Read moreHow Dare They Criticise Me! How To Make Good Use Of Feedback
How not to drown in other people's opinions.
Read moreIt’s All About You – Why Writing Your Best CV Takes Selfishness
Reading your CV should make you smile, because it contains the very essence of who you are, and what you’re all about.
Read more(Don’t) Show Your Work: How To Become A Confident Creator
Create like nobody's watching... so that when they are, you're ready.
Read moreLacking In Experience? Here’s Why You Should Apply For That Job Anyway
A creative approach could work wonders for your career.
Read moreThe Trials and Tribulations of the Freelance Holiday
As a freelance writer, taking a break is always a challenge. But I push on through the guilt, and here's why.
Read moreOK, so you got a six-figure business. That don't impress me much
Where's the value in empty business gurus?
Read moreThe Art of the Written Compliment
If you're too embarrassed to give (or receive!) compliments, writing it all down can work wonders
Read moreLooking for a way to beat the January blues? Start with a letter
It's Universal Letter Writing Week - how will you celebrate?
Read moreKick-start your writing in 2019 (with a little help from me!)
I’ve gathered together some of my most-read blog posts, tips and tools to help you get writing.
Read moreFive Fantastic New Year's Resolutions for Freelancers
Five easy resolutions to help your freelancing career thrive in 2019 - promise!
Read moreStuck in a career rut? Get someone else to write your CV – and thrive!
"The right person will help you come across as yourself, but in a prouder, more polished, 'look what I’ve achieved' kind of way"
Read moreHow to give good interview (whatever side of the desk you’re on!)
Simple tips to help you breeze through any interview scenario.
Read moreWhy giving up on social media is a mistake...
Easy tips to help you fit social media nicely into your life - no mindfulness seminars required.
Read moreIf you can’t take criticism, don’t be a writer!*
You can always learn from other people's insights - good or bad
Read moreFinding your freelancing tribe: be uncompromising (and don’t be too nice!)
My advice to freelancers: never lose sight of what freelancing is all about!
Read more
Appreciate your freelancers, and be rewarded with their best work
How to become every freelancer's favourite client!
Read moreWhy a degree doesn't equal real-world competence
Sometimes, just putting the work in is enough.
Read moreRelax: a “no” for a freelance job can be a good thing!
Know what you're good at, and rejection won't seem so bad!
Read more
Talk confidently about something you love: set a speaking challenge!
How setting a speaking challenge forced me to talk confidently about the work I love.
Read moreFreelance reflections in the snow
Just like building the perfect snowman, carving out your freelance identity can be tough!
Read moreWhy spelling and grammar don't matter
Don't let bad spelling put you off writing the next bestseller!
Read moreWhat's in a name? Captivate and connect with simple business stories
Finding the 'what's', 'whys' and 'hows' of your business will help people connect with you.
Read moreFive New Year's Resolutions for Freelancers
Are your social media posts crushing your business?
Lone wolf or team worker - which is best?
How to write interesting content for any business (even yours)
What are your customers really saying about you?
How will I sound like me, when you're doing the writing?
Ironically, it's when you're writing about yourself that you will sound least like you. Hiring a writer to do it for you can bring a whole host of benefits.
Read moreHow coffee and cake can change your career!
How involving others will help expand your career horizons.
Read moreTake control of your career this summer
Take advantage of summer downtime to learn and grow in your career - or discover a new one!
Read moreWhy you definitely shouldn't write a book in a weekend!
Writing books is big business - or at least it can be, if you get it right. For starters, this means not rushing the process!
Read moreWhat do successful entrepreneurs and guests on the Jeremy Kyle Show have in common?
There's a lot of vague career advice out there, so if you're looking for insight that goes beyond "be yourself and follow your passion" you may have to leap before you look!
Read moreCreate a schedule you can stick to (it's not as hard as you think!)
Creating a schedule can be a difficult task, especially when you're planning for work you're not being paid for - or that nobody is expecting! Here's how to get started on crafting a time plan that will work for you.
Read moreOn creating a writer's life
This week I'm responding to the questions people have asked since my Careershifters' Success Story was published recently - all about creating a writer's life.
Read moreHome truths for aspiring remote workers
Remote working is on the increase - so here's some advice on how to work it well!
Read moreDiscovering your unique writer's voice is easier than you think
You don't have to be a professional writer to discover a unique writing voice that speaks to its readers. Finding your own voice is often easier than you might think, and it all starts when you write from the heart.
Read moreReal-life lessons I learned from changing my career
I'm a 'Success Story'! My career change journey was featured on Careershifters' website this week, and I'm incredibly proud of it. But I wouldn't want anybody to think changing my career has been easy. And so this is a reflection of sorts, on where I was when I began, and how I've ended up where I am now.
Read more“Telling it like it is” – giving effective feedback in writing
There's a new trend sweeping Silicon Valley - giving honest and direct feedback to your colleagues. Before you go rushing in, focus your message by writing it down first...your colleagues and your career will thank you for it!
Read moreShare your expertise - write a business book!
All those celebrated business gurus had to start somewhere...and the most successful ones know how to tell their stories in a relatable way that inspires others to act on their dreams and ideas. By writing a business book, you can do just that yourself!
Read moreRead this before you write your next recruitment ad!
Writing a recruitment ad is often a rushed activity, with the words used ones you've read many times before ("dynamic" anyone?) Here's how the Banks children managed to recruit their ideal candidate - Mary Poppins! - by using clear and creative words that stood out.
Read more‘CV Greatest Hits’ Countdown – 10 ultimate CV tips to prepare you for the Great 2017 Job Hunt!
'Greatest Hits' countdowns are rife at this time of year - so now, here's one featuring the best CV advice. This list will give you the ultimate steer if you're looking to get your CV on track for the new year job hunt. Wishing you a very happy 2017!
Read moreGive yourself a special Christmas gift...a happy working life in 2017!
If you're stuck in a job you don't particularly like, mindlessly searching job boards for something else, it can be hard to dredge up any enthusiasm to make a change. But that little bit of rest time between Christmas and a brand new year beginning is perfect for considering exactly what you want, and how to take the very first step towards making 2017 your happy work year!
Read moreWriting to get what you want at work!
Have you ever thought that making a few tweaks to your working life would help make living it much easier? Harness the power of well-chosen words to state your case and win better work-life balance in the process.
Read moreFitting in ‘me’ projects – five panic-free time management tips for the professionally overwhelmed
Is time getting the better of you? With a growing business, several passion projects on the go, books to read and friends I'd quite like to see, I was starting to feel overwhelmed...until I decided to take a closer look at planning my time more effectively. Here's how you can do the same.
Read moreUse your sense of style to build trust and win business!
Looking for ways to sound consistent and authentic in your written communications? Here are a few tried, tested and original ways to do just that.
Read moreThe (Not-So) Secret Life of an HR Manager
Ever wonder what your HR Manager is really thinking, or what they do all day? I worked in this oft-misunderstood profession for a number of years and now I'm safely out of it, I'm free to vent!
Read more
