“Do one thing every day that scares you.”

That line is from Baz Luhrmann’s Everybody’s Free (To Wear Sunscreen); a ‘song’ I loved in 1997 for its profound and comforting words.  (I’ve written ‘song’ like that because it isn’t one, really.  It’s just Baz Luhrmann reciting a speech over a generic backing track).

I don’t find those words profound or comforting now – more mawkish and a tad patronising – but still, “do one thing every day that scares you” stood out.  Not that I actually do one thing every day that scares me, you understand.  I frighten ridiculously easily, so “do one thing every now and then that scares you” is much more my style.

Usually, the scary things I do involve joining intimidating groups, and by ‘intimidating groups’ I mean every kind of group.  I’m not a ‘group’ person, and I find people who are baffling.  The inclination!  The energy!  The confidence!  I have to work hard to maintain all of those things, to the point where I need to lie down in a dark room when it’s all done.

It’s not that I don’t like other people.  I just find groups of them unnerving, because of the way groups shroud our personalities in sameness.  When we’re part of a group, we tend to be whatever that group is about… so instead of myself, I’m a writer, or a reader, or a career-changer, or a freelancer, or someone who wants to learn improvised comedy.  (Yes, those are all groups I’ve joined).  So is everyone else in that group.

But. 

Despite how unnerved I feel, I also get that group-sameness offers a level playing field of sorts.  When you talk about writing with another writing group-ee, you get the benefit of their experience and perspective, and they yours… and it’s all because you’re members of the same group.

I’m looking on the bright side of group-ness because of one I’ve just joined.  It’s probably the most intimidating yet; it’s the “do one thing every now and then that scares you” of this decade.  Everyone else in this group appears to be seriously credentialled, and then there’s me.  In a way, that’s a good thing.  I want to up my game and learn new skills, and doing that means challenging myself… spending time around seriously credentialled people like these.

I’m just nervous, I suppose, because I part of me is worried I won’t be able to keep my end up. Hopefully, I’ll learn valuable things, but will I have anything of value to offer?

I’ve thought all this before, of course, and nine times out of ten it’s all turned out fine.  Not explosively amazing, but fine.  The trick (and it really is the trick) is to throw myself in, do everything that’s asked of me, and make a genuine effort.

(And… remember that “worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum”).